we've come a long way

i never thought we'd come this far. i still remember how we started, how i used to get worried if you'd leave me. with all the distance between us, sometimes the longing for each other might get a little out of hand. and those are the time when i get worried if you'd just give up and leave.

i remember how i used to blame myself whenever you said you were bored. that helpless feeling i get whenever you say something like that. but as time went by, i slowly learnt that some things are out of my control. if you're bored, then you are. i cant do anything about it. unless its my fault. hmmmm..

i remember how everything felt surreal. how i woke up in the morning, jumped on my phone just to look at the messages to make sure this isn't just one of my dreams. then i'd smile to my phone just reading the messages we've had.

i remember how i thought that keeping things to myself would be way better than confiding in you. i thought that somehow if these thoughts were kept inside, somehow they would just disappear, but man, i was wrong. when i finally told you my problems, everything felt so much better, so much clearer.

i remember how we used to not have that many phone calls at night. it felt more like i was scared of annoying you. but now, as we get closer at heart, the distance seems to bring this longing for each other, which leads to past midnight calls just to find comfort in your voice.

i remember how i used to lie to you like it's no one's business. like it wont hurt you. i now realize how lies can hurt, no matter how small they are. i can't promise i'll stop lying, but i promise i'll try to stop. i'll try real hard.

we've entered the honeymoon stage and went out of it once or twice. but somehow we'll always end up at where we want to be. i hope this will last. i hope this will never end. but people say after the honeymoon stage, we'll reach the stage where our relationship is really put to the test. but i hope we'll last.

as i said, some things are out of my control, some things are not only one sided. i'll just leave things in the hands of fate.

but i want you to know, i'm in this for the long run. i hope you are too. :)

happy 7 months baby. :)